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Phil Musick called them "things I think I think." Bruce Keidan called them "loose items from a tight-leaf notebook." They're thoughts that don't fit anywhere else.

I call them "cluttered items from an empty mind." Because if a cluttered desk is the sign of a cluttered mind, what does an empty desk signify?

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We watched a little bit of "Lady Gaga and The Muppets" last night. I wonder how many puppeteers it takes to operate Lady Gaga?

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Joan Jett and The Blackhearts were in the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade. Dear Lord. Punk rock is truly dead.

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Andi Luketic Cartwright, who operates the "McKeesport Memories" Facebook page, found this ad for "Dr. John" in the archives of the McKeesport Regional History & Heritage Center. I think he was in the right place, but it must have been the wrong time.

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The reliably funny (and notably liberal) Charlie Pierce, who regularly punctures pomposity for Esquire magazine's website, demolished New York Times columnist Maureen Dowd this week, whose family he described as "the clan in 'Three Cheers For The Irish,' had but Thomas Mitchell been Boris Karloff."

From Pierce's post comes my new catchphrase: "Have the kittens stopped screaming, Maureen?"

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Mark Evanier says, "I know they don't mean it the wrong way but it still jars me when I post an obit on Facebook and hundreds hit the 'like' button."

On the one hand, I don't really like snow. On the other hand, my new car has brand new snow tires, and I'm kind of itchin' to try 'em out.

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By writing all of this disjointed, one-line gibberish, am I turning into Larry King? Glassport, Pa.! You're on the air!

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When the weather forecasters call for a chance of "wintry mix," what does that mean? Is it a side dish, like green beans with water chestnuts?

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In England, is Cookie Monster called Biscuit Monster?

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Out of all of the conspiracy theories I've regarding the assassination of President Kennedy, I'm still convinced that Cadillac Motor Division killed JFK. Because Nov. 22, 1963, did nothing for the image of Lincoln Continental convertibles. (What? Too soon?)

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